It is very common to face some struggles while dating a PhD student. Here are the list of major struggles.
- Limited time to date a PhD guy.
- No money to date perfectly.
- Living in separation mostly.
- PhD guy is less confident to date.
- Increase of stress level while dating.
- Lack of concentration on social relationships.
- Unable to move farther places.
- Mental Problems due to PhD burden.
- Dating a PhD student means nothing special.
- There is limited free time to date.
The most precious moments for a relationship is when the two of you meet, share ideas, console with each other, and correct each other where one has gone wrong.
When dating a Ph.D. student you may fail to enjoy these privileges because there is no available time for them. You call her at 3 p.m. requesting to meet late in the evening, and what is the response? “I have an evening class and a report to write”.
You have no complaints and if there is any, you are reminded of how the Ph.D. needs concentration. How crazy your thoughts would be.
- Financial struggles
Dating comes with responsibilities between the two parties which require money. I agree that money is not a solution for love but acknowledge that it is essential in strengthening a relationship in meeting some obligations.
For example, a Ph.D. course is expensive and when dating such student, you will receive calls and emails requesting you to support the printing and photocopying the seminar papers, buying of research materials, fare, rental, and even food.
Some will even request some cash to buy credit for calling their supervisors. What if you don’t have a job or any other source of cash? You would be disappointed.
- The detachment between yourselves
You have a girlfriend studying her Ph.D. at Stockholm school of economics while you live and work in Lund city. Despite the time factor that would affect your meeting frequency, the distance between you is also an issue. Remember distance is proportional to time. So I sound mathematical? Take it easy.
- Slowed progressive planning
The possible objective of dating is to familiarize yourselves most probably for the purpose of marriage. Whenever it comes to marriage, you need to plan well, as it’s not a dawn-dusk happening. Ph.D. on the other side, though the least projected completion time is 4-5 years, this does not happen as an obvious occurrence.
- Different value perspective
A Ph.D. student will argue you even for observable principles or ideas you may raise. They will always raise the why, how and when questions which makes you think despised.
- They see no eligibility in men
These scholars they have the mentality of independence. What they believe in is to work hard, find a good job and stay independent. When you happen to date them, they will expose you a list of principles of which they don’t fear losing you. Sometimes you have to be under them and even could not believe in you.
Do you know those ladies advocating for gender equality? They always believe they would be mistreated by men. How can you convince such minds? The possible outcome would be frustrations on you.
- You would possibly be depressed
Consider that happy moment you are with your partner who happens to be a Ph.D. student. All of a sudden he starts describing how the research was, how tough is the experimental analysis, and how boring are the evening classes and so on. This is not even the issue.
You have specifically met for a limited time, which has been proposed by him, yet he will waste the same time boasting about his Ph.D., which you always desired to pursue but you miss funding. You become dejected.
- You stay in fear
When your partner is a Ph.D. student and it happens you are just a bachelor graduate, you become insecure of the next level the dating will lead to. There is a possibility of separation as a result of pride.
Maybe your partner wishes you also advance your academics when you don’t see any possibility, you would possibly be worried and always fearful of losing each other.
- You are limitedly available in their mental space
The mind of a lady pursuing her Ph.D. is always set on how the research would be done, how she is going to defend her thesis if she will really make it in the doctoral program. She would end a full day even a week without thinking of you.
- They are not creative
Some of these people when you take them to a date, they can’t think of something creative to enjoy it. Since they are more into scholarly work, they will always advise you on reading novels and other academic works.
You have now seen some of the challenges you are probably meet when dating Ph.D. students. They should not scare you as you also need to compare with the positive side. After all, it’s only loving that matters.
Is it true that love is blind as some people would claim? I have also heard others say that affection is inseparable. Maybe it’s true, for some like Romeo and Juliet.
Indeed love is natural and comes with its own package that requires only the chosen to unfold. And that’s why the rich love the poor, elites for illiterate, the disabled and the insane have children.
Is there a relationship between love and academics? As far as the scholarly world exists, most people have fallen in deep traps with numerous challenges when dating a learned fellow.
I know you may be looking for a love partner and most probably believing a Ph.D. student is the best choice. However, what you never know is that there are shortcomings you will meet when dating these people. Are you surprised? Let’s go!